Conjure Service Guidelines
Please read this entire section very carefully,
if you might be interested in retaining my services
for any spell work.
You will need to be familiar with the document here:
I'm a Root Doctor, not a medical doctor. I am not a therapist or a lawyer.
Any advice that I give you should be followed up by consulting with your physician and/or any other professional caregiver that you have.
Any services I render to you are spiritual in nature and as such are not recognized as being valid by our current, legal system.
Any herbs, baths, teas, or any other products that I carry may have, for some small percentage of the population, some kind of allergic or other adverse reaction.
I am not a specialist in the field of assessing or treating any illness that is physical or mental. The work I do is purely spiritual in nature. Your medical health is vitally important and should be placed solely in the care of your physician. Leave your physical and mental health to the folks who have the licenses for that... not me.
Before you burn any incense, put any oils on your skin, take a bath in any type of herb mixture or ingest any substance that we offer, check with your doctor. You take full responsibility upon yourself regarding any allergies you have, or any medical conditions, such as diabetes, pregnancy or nursing, drugs you take that may cause reactions with any herbs (MAOI inhibitors, for instance).
Please be aware of the following
I require your full name and address. These must be current and accurate, or else I will not work for you.
I have a NO REFUND policy. Absolutely no exceptions.
Working with me is like going to a doctor. The doctor does not guarantee success, nor does your lawyer. All they can do is try.
Anyone who tells you they can guarantee success is a no good, lying shit. Notice I did not mince words there. The internet is full of con artists who guarantee results. Give them a try and watch your money go bye-bye. They might even think they can guarantee success, in which case they are not liars, but idiots.
The very best sorcerers have maybe an 80% success rate. That's the VERY BEST. I usually bat about 60-70% and that depends on various factors.
What I can guarantee you is that I will do my best for you. If at first we don't succeed, we can try again with a different tactic.
There are plenty of ordinary, every day things you have tried in your life that didn't work the first time, right? Magick is sometimes like that as well. Sometimes the third spell does the trick. Sometimes the first spell works just fine.
If you have a disease, you go see the doctor. He or she gives you some tests and a diagnosis. If that diagnosis proves to be incorrect, and/or the treatments don't work, then the doctor tells you... we were wrong.
Then they change tactics… but you DON'T get your money back. You still have to pay for the next visits and the new treatments.
Working with me is exactly the same. Like the doctor, you are paying me for my time, my counsel and my services. I will do my very best to help you, but some problems may prove to be very difficult and some are even impossible. Yes, impossible.
Doctors can't save every patient and I can't walk on water. I will do my best for you and that is all that I can promise.
Why then, would you want to use my services? If there is at best a 70% chance of success? Well, there are several reasons. For one, you will know upfront that I'm being honest with you, whereas someone else will just blow smoke up your ass and assure you that they cannot possibly fail.
So, working with someone honest means you are starting from a good place. Working with someone who promises success, you are only throwing your money away.
Are you trying to gain a new lover? OK, so that new outfit you bought... did it really guarantee you that you'd get that boy or girl of your dreams? No, of course not.
But you bought it just the same, for the advantage it gives you. In that new outfit, you feel more confident and you look more appealing. I can work with you, to try to get you that extra edge... and every little bit helps.
If you have me work for you, then you can honestly say that you tried EVERYTHING. Don't walk around saying that you just couldn't make it happen... that you tried EVERYTHING!"
Let me take a crack at your problem. If it still turns out that we couldn't make it happen, then you can hold your head high, knowing that you took every action that was available to you. Being able to sleep at night is worth way more than what I charge for my services.
There MAY be a need for me to give you something like an amulet, sachet or talisman, etc. You may have some regular responsibility with it, such as feeding it. This usually means applying a special oil to it, or saying a prayer over it, smoking it with a certain incense, or something like that.
If you are not OK with that, you need to let me know up front, so I can plan something more low maintenance for you. If I tell you to follow through and you agree but you don't actually do it, then guess what? It will fail.
Magick takes the path of least resistance, just like electricity, so I cannot promise you that what you want to happen, will happen exactly the way you want it to... or even at all. All we can do is give it a go.
People often times simply do not recognize that something has happened. This is usually because they are looking for the miraculous when what they should be expecting is something mundane and very ordinary, something that just happens to fit their needs. The answers to your problems will usually come from what seem like mundane sources, even though they were brought about by magickal means. It has been said that
People quite often fail to recognize opportunity,
because when it shows up, it is dressed in work clothes!
If you have me do a working for for money, it will not fall from the sky. You will have to go out and work for it.
But a working can provide you with more opportunities to make money. A huge reason that spells fail is that the client does not follow all instructions to the letter.
Shortcuts, half-measures and half-hearted attitudes will not bear fruit.
If you take the let's just poke at it with a stick and see if it moves" approach, you will have wasted your time and money.
However, I still get paid... so why do I even care about any of this? Because I want to build a roster of happy clients, so I can feel good about what I do.
So, I am really only interested in working with people who will do exactly what it takes to help the spell take effect and remain effective. You'll know the instructions in advance, so you do get to make an informed decision.
You don't quit halfway through the process and expect everything to work as planned.
The Spirits that I petition on your behalf will expect you to exhibit some backbone in the matter. They will insist that you stand up and do some of it yourself, if you are at all capable of it. No free rides, even in the world of magick.
There are serious karmic repercussions for the abuse of magick. If you tell me that you need protection from a guy named Ted, yet actually... Ted never actually threatened you. The truth is that you just hate him because of… well, whatever… you need to understand that the Spirits that I work with are not going to hurt him or wish him into the cornfield for you. You may pull the wool over my eyes, but not theirs.
There are plenty of black magicians out there who are willing to help you, as long as you don't mind unleashing suffering into your life. But I am not the person you seek. I will tell you to go away.
Keep silent about any and all workings. Don't talk about them to anyone. Magick works best in silence. Even friends can ruin a working, without even meaning to. So, tell no one.
If it is something that will be finished at a certain point, you might be able to tell people after the fact. Example, we do a working to help you get a job. Then, you get that new job. After, say, six months, you still have the job. Well, at that point… it might be OK to tell very close friends. But I would not tell your boss or coworkers!
Not all workings require you to actually do anything, but if I give you a set of instructions, then you need to follow them... just as I laid them out. You might think that cutting a corner over here, or substituting something over there, won't make a difference. You are wrong about that. It will make a difference.
If the doctor tells you to take two aspirin and call him in the morning, you don't take two Ibuprofen and then call him at noon.
I will help you formulate a proper spell request, so you will be positioned for success. If you have a very narrow, rigid outcome, then you have a much greater chance of failure. An example of a request that is too narrow is
I want a job at the Y-Mart on 2nd Street,
as Supervisor, on 1st shift... and I want weekends off
If it's not really suitable for you to get Outcome A, then the energy from the spell will just die out, immediately. It will NOT seek out any other ground point. The spell was programmed to a single, possible outcome and when it hit a dead end, it could go no further and it dissipated.
On the other hand, if you have a wide net, such as a spell with a flexible wording, it leaves you open for many possibilities. You then stand a much better chance at success. Such a spell will keep seeking out new leads, until either it finds a suitable ground or the energy dissipates over time. An example of a well-worded spell request is to
obtain and keep a job that gives me
financial security and a high quality of life
Any request that is too specific, will either hit its target or die out, because it is simply impossible for the spell to complete its mission.
A more generalized request will not very specifically try to hit Outcome A, but rather it will try to hit what is pragmatic. It won't go for pie-in-the-sky, because that is impractical. It won't just go for the easiest target, because that does not meet its programming for attaining the most advantageous and excellent outcome possible.
The Spirit charged with the task will try for the best possible conclusion for you, one that strikes a nice blend of both doable and desirable. If that fails, it will then seek another, easier target and so on. This way, you end up usually getting some sort of useable result. Such a working will at very least pay for itself.
But sometimes, you get lucky and hit the jackpot, so to speak; and no... actual gambling is not recommended. Gambling magick is not strictly off limits, but it's gambling and what I do with my clients is strategic.
It's terribly important not to have any spiritual crossed conditions when spell work is attempted. If spell work is done for a client who has crossed conditions, then the energy will not ground anywhere at all, but instead it will keep looping until it finally dissipates. Curses and spirit attachments will cause people to become a sort of positive repellant and/or a negative attractant.
If you hire me, then DO NOT hire anyone else to work magick for you as well, on the same matter. This is important!
You might think you are doubling up on the power, but you're not… you are only messing it up, royally. You could conceivably cause yourself some problems that cannot easily be fixed.
If you want to work with another magician instead of me, fine. Do whatever you want, I won't chase your business.
But realize that if you hire two practitioners to work on the same problem, you are demonstrating a lack of faith in each of them. It could also cause problems for the workers that you hire.
If a time frame can be given for your working, then I will let you know. But for most things, there is just no timeline to be reckoned. A few things can be expected within X number of days, weeks, or months. But not most.
Check back with me if it doesn't work within the time frame I gave you. We'll try something else. Be patient and I will do my level best to help you achieve your desired result.
Don't expect instant results from any working.
It can happen that way, but usually doesn't. Most things take time to manifest on the material plane. Usually, the Spirits are usually not too eager to help impatient people, anyway.
I will take photos of the work that I do for you, because your mind will need some sort of closure, some small assurance that the work has actually been done.
It is best to look at these photos only once, then delete them. Certainly do not show them to anyone else.
All payments must be received in advance.
You will need to have a consultation with me before I will consent to work with you. If I do a divination and it comes up bad, I will not do the working. However, there is almost always another way I can help you.
For example, you ask me to help you get a job at Company X. The divination comes up bad. But then I do another reading and we determine that we can help you get an equally good (or better) job at a different company in the same field. There are multiple routes to take. But still... just wait until I give you the go ahead before you pay, because I reserve the right to say no to any request, for any reason.
For any working related to love, please state whether you are married, divorced, single, or in a relationship. If you are in a relationship, is it open or committed? Is it a new relationship or have you been together for over a year? Be aware in advance that I frown on adulterous relationships. That's my bias and I am entitled to it. If you are involved in an affair, I will not help you, unless you are ready to stop the affair and get back on an honorable path.
I make no judgements on things like open relationships. What honest, consenting adults do is strictly between themselves. But lies are another matter, entirely. If you are sneaking around, doing things that would hurt someone else if they knew about them, then I have no sympathy for you.
Honesty is courage and deceit is cowardice. See the page called Love & Money for more about all of that.
You must be at least 18 years of age to have any services rendered by Thaumaturgy 777 or to be a student of the Nascent Magician course, unless written, parental consent is given by both parents, or by the primary custodial parent.